I got behind on posting my columns here. Here is my second-most-recent column from over at Project Simplify:
The Not-So-Simple Life: Life in The Big House
by Lance Brown
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Which do you want first: the good news or the bad news?
OK, the good news. I made it out of the storage trap, and in record time!
Thank you, thank you…you’re too kind. (I assume you’re applauding. If not, my bad—I’ll wait ‘til your hands are free.)
What’s that you say? Oh right, the bad news. Well, good news, because even the bad news has good news. That good news is that I now have plenty of room for houseguests!
Alright, fine…I told myself I wasn’t going to be coy again this time.
The bad news is this: I’m now renting a 4-bedroom house with a 2-car garage and a huge yard.
What’s that you say? That doesn’t sound so bad? You may not be hearing what I’m hearing. You’ve kinda got to lean in close…there’s another voice behind that main headline one, kinda sneaky and whispering. Wait—shh-shh-shh—you can hear it…listen:
I’m going to take on tons of new stuff over the next 6 months.
There it is! It’s a wily one, that little truth. Oh, shh…I think there’s more…
I’m keeping a lot of the things from storage that I had planned to give away.
Ouch, that one stung a little. Though to be fair, I fi-
I’m spending 600 bucks to truck the rest of my shit across the state.
Geez, OK, we get it! No need to get rude, little whispering voice!
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